What's missing?

What if obtaining love or attention, in any form, was as easy as pressing the enter button on your computer? The world we live in today is so technology-based that many people probably wish it was this easy. The truth of the matter is people are starved for attention. We try to gain the attention of our peers, teachers, parents, co-wokers, and even complete strangers on a daily basis. People want attention and will find a way of getting it, whether it's good or bad. But the question is why have traditions changed? Why have people changed?

To answer that, we have to start from the beginning; before all the fancy gadgets and modern technology. I like to call it: Pre-tech era. Before television was invented, people had to rely on each other for fun. Kids would get together and play outside or even create their own games like bat-the-can, which was a simple form of baseball.

Life was considered "cookie cutter" Mom stayed home and watched the children while dad went off to work. Dinner was on the table by 5 p.m. every night and then the family would sit around the radio together and listen to the news or radio dramas/comedies. Life was good. The reason it was probably so good was because the parents (and kids) did not have any distractions. Plus, no one knew anything other than the life they lived. They had no clue about technology because it didn't exist, and these families managed to get through life just fine without it.

So then why did people change? With the invention of all things technical, people became crazed to get the latest and greatest thing. The standard saying, "Keeping up with the Joneses" turned into who can surpass the Joneses faster! Technology grew, lives grew, homes grew, but while those things grew bigger, quality family time grew smaller. Families are too distracted with their phones, computers, and televisions to realize that the people that matter most are not getting the attention they deserve.

In Alone Together, author Sherry Turkle touches on nostalgia of the youth in chapter fourteen. The issues she raised in this particular chapter dealt more with children's feelings on their parent's addiction with technology. How often can you think back in the past week, or even the past day, about when you saw a parent figure too entwined with their phone to watch the child with them? Children that grew up with all this technology should be used to it by now. So, why are they yearning for the days before computers and smart phones?

If these children don't know the difference in life before technology, how will they know they like it better than now? There's a few reasons I can think. One is that the children used technology itself to "Google" how life was back in the day, pre-tech era. Another theory is maybe they heard stories from their grandparents who talked about how they had to walk back and forth, five miles to school, in the snow, uphill and don't realize how good they have it now.

But do they have it good, or better then their grandparents? In a way, inventions are great. They invention of new medical machines and medicine helped the general life-span of the average person. Cures for certain illnesses weren't around fifty or one-hundred years ago.

But the invention of technology such as cell phones-good or bad? Well, the answer is both. However, according to many teens in Sherry Turkle's book, the answer is bad. These teenagers have a nostalgia for a time period in life that they never knew. They are constantly being ignored by their friends, and much worse, by their parents.

If mom or dad is too busy texting or emailing through their phone, then they just don't have that one-on-one connection with their child. The problem with these gadgets is they can go anywhere and everywhere the parents do. They go on family vacations, to the playground, and even to dinner. They know no boundaries.


The problem that children face today is that they have to battle not only with their parents going off to work or out with friends, but also with mobile devices. Kids already act out in different ways to get their parents attention and it seems for this young generation, the attention is less and less each day; thus causing the children to act out even more.

When I was watching The Real Housewives of Orange County a few seasons back, one of the mothers on the show was giving her two teenage daughters everything they wanted, except punishment. The fifteen year old began staying out late, drinking, getting mixed in with the wrong crowd and back-talking her parents. The mother could not control her because she wanted her daughter to see her as a friend, not a parent. All the daughter wanted was to be grounded.

Weird, right? What teenager WANTS to be grounded? The issue was that the daughter was trying to get the mother's attention, but her actions still didn't work. This is a vicious cycle that will continue until people realize they need to put down the phone and interact with their friends and family. Kids don't want to tell their parents to get off their phones because the children know they are just as guilty of constantly using their own phones.

I get so frustrated when I'm meeting a group of friends that I haven't seen in a few months and we're all sitting at a table in the middle of a restaurant and I look up and see every person on their phone. What is the point of catching up on each other's lives if we aren't going to talk? I often wonder what life would be like if all things technical and electrical stopped working...just for one week. I don't think people would know what to do with themselves. We rely so much on other people for tasks as simple as grocery shopping that I really do not think the majority of the population could figure out how to live off the land. Imagine if your car broke down and your cell phone didn't work. Back in the 70s and 80s (and even early 90s) you had to flag a ride from a stranger. People would gasp at the thought now, and that wasn't even twenty years ago!